Script
One Night, Three barrels of Wine, two Chocobo and You. Act 4 - The Wedding
Narrator: And so the day has come at last, after professing his undying love to her the Regal Baron Vigo Von Sloot prepares for his wedding to the Lady Vanbeltin. Unbeknownst to him is her evening two days past where in a drunken haze she promised herself to the mighty seafaring warrior Norg Yorgist. As the couple ready themselves for the ceremony that evening Norg rides to claim his love astride his faithful Chocobo Halifax.
(Lady Vanbeltin enters from stage Right, arms outstretched and turning a few circles before facing out to the Audience. Baron Von Sloot enters stage left, standing and watching her with a smile on his face.)
LVB: "Ah tonight my love we shall be wed, nothing could spoil this glorious evening.
BVS: "Yes dearest, soon you shall be Lady Von Sloot and together we shall rules over these lands and lead the people to prosperity and a brighter future. A future that will span the generations as the Von Sloots will continue their bloodline."
(The couple walk to stage right and embrace, from stage left Norg Yorgist enters astride Halifax giving a bellowing cry and swinging his blade wildly over his head.)
NY: Heeeee-yaaaaaaaa!
Hal: WARK!
LVB: Norg! What... what are you doing here? You should be on the western seas on your way to the port of Sulton.
(Mount and rider stop center stage)
NY: Not so fast ya pompous primping bastard son of a sheep and frilly ball of fluff! The lady did give herself to me not three nights past and by the sons of my forefathers no one denies the hand of Norg Yorgist! The wench belong to me and I've come to collect!
Hal: Waaaaaark!
(Von Sloot steps towards Norg, drawing a sword of his own. Vanbeltin staying back her hand over her mouth in shame.)
BVS: Liar! This fair maiden would not sully herself to lay with the likes of you! Surely either you are mad or some foul trickery is at work, you shall not leave with the lady.. but you most assuredly shall leave!
(Halifax trots off to stage left leaving the two facing one another blades drawn.)
BVS: Besides, what could a filthy beast like you possibly have to offer a woman such as the fair Vanbeltin?
(Norg takes center stage facing the audience. Cue music, begin song "Come with me")
Norg:
Come with me my darling, we'll take off on the oceans.
The waves and rocking motions, will be our greatest ride.
We'll live a life of daring, smelling slightly of a Herring.
And tame the rolling rides.
We'll sail away
Spend all the day
upon the blue and briny
A life of ease
Live as we please
Our path befooooooore us shining!
So come with me,
Yes come with me!
(Halifax steps to center center, leaning in against Norg)
Hal:
Waaaark!
Wark wark wark Waaaark!
Wark Wark!
Wark Wark Wark Wark Wark!
WAAAAAARK!!
(Norg and Halifax step to stage left, Von Sloot taking center stage.)
BVS:
Come with me my darling, and live a life of Leisure.
Indulging every pleasure, no cares in all the world.
Your life would have no worries, no stresses and no hurries.
It's wonders all unfurled.
We'll spend the day
how 'ere we may
life is our for the taking
A life of ease
Live as we please
Our future oooooour own making!
So come with me,
Yes come with me!
(Von sloot steps to Stage right, Vanbeltin taking center stage)
LVB:
(Looks to Norg) To live a life of Dashing, with Sword and Armor clashing To ride upon the tides. (Looks to Von Sloot) To live a life of pleasure, no need to search for treasure A family at my side.
One man of Wealth One Man of Strength Decisions not made lightly
To sail the seas Or life of ease The struggles rage inside me.
What will I be? What will I be!?
(End Music, Norg steps up to grasp Vanbeltin by the arm.)
Hal: WARK!
NY: Enough of this! Ye made a pledge to me and I'll see you keep it by thunder!
(Von Sloot pulls Vanbeltin from Norg's grasp, raising his blade.)
BVS: Barbarian you will leave now or you will taste my steel!
(Norg laughs and whips his own sword over his head several times.)
NY: Frilly little titmouse, best run along before you hurt yourself with that little thing. No man has faced my wrath and lived to tell the tale.
(Vanbeltin gets between the pair) Enough of this both of you! You act like children while asking me to make a decision that will define the rest of my life!
(Halifax walks up behind Vanbeltin and seems to bite her on the rump, Vanbeltin shrieks and runs off stage right. Von Sloot swings at Halifax who ducks and Norg blocks the strike)
BVS: Wretched beast!
NY: Have at you!
(The pair begin to duel, swords clanging over and over. After a few moments Halifax steps up and gives Von Sloot a kick in the butt causing him to jump comically. Vanbeltin returns with a broom and Swats Halifax, the action is now Norg and Von Sloot continuing to duel while Vanbeltin chases Halifax about the stage with the broom, occasionally Halifax stopping to give Von Sloot another kick in the butt. Continue action for several minutes until Halifax runs between the two warrior and Von Sloot 'stabs' Vanbeltin, who collapses with his sword.)
BVS: No! My love!
NY: NO!
Hal: WARK!
(Both men kneel at the fallen woman's side. Music to "Come with me" begins again)
LVB:
To live a life of Dashing, To live a life of power. In this my final hour, shows the folly of my ways. For I have loved too freely, in ways that are unseemly and now it ends.. my days.
(Vanbeltin lays still, the men both jumping to their feet with Von Sloot regaining his sword)
NY: Murderer!
BVS: Monster!
(Both Men stab one another and collapse. Halifax trots around the scene for a moment before giving a single "WARK!" and leaving stage left.)
Narrator: So ends the torrid tale of love gone wrong. When one shares their soul two many ways, there is never enough to go around. Vanbeltin let a night of wine and lust taint her judgement, and in doing so has destroyed three lives.
(Scene ends, cast stands and gives bow to audience. Close curtain.)
